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so sleep alone tonight
Shu Ern.
16 earthling years. Gutsy and sarcastic. Mushroom on head. Hide sweets at unreachable places just so that she doesn't eat too many of them. Breed dinosaurs. |
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about this blog
This blog was opened by Shu Ern, the mushroom dinosaur to accomodate her mindless musings and daily rantings.Do enjoy your stay here, and don't take what's not yours! tagboard
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A ghost who lives
Today is the 31st of December. It is 9:48 pm now. It's the year of 2008. I'm fifteen.A lot of things happen this year. Although I can't recall all of them due to my bad memory, but all and all I think I have a good year. I have my ups and downs like normal people. But I think I dealt with it well. I just got my PMR result yesterday, even tho I did not get a straight, perfect A for it, I'm still not gonna let anything get me down. I am the one that never give up. I'm the one with all the energy and spunk. If I get sad, who won't? Yesterday is in the past and the year 2008 will be in the past too within hours. In the year 2009, I'm gonna discover more of myself. Since, I have been a trophy kid for my mum for years that I don't even count anymore; I have been lost for the past 2 and a half year; lately I found myself, a great me that not only me but also my friend likes. I'm always described as ' doesn't give a damn'. But seriously, I do. I just never show it. Now that, I'm not trying too hard, things became easier. I figured that I don't have to be the same to be liked. I don't always have to smile and tell jokes to be liked. I don't have to look good all the time to be liked. I don't have to be smart to be liked. The only thing I have to do is be myself. Sometimes, when you care so much, you go berserk. And when you cool down, you noticed that others are the ones who don't give a damn. Life is only decades long which is not so long at all. So if I don't live my moment now as myself, when will I? I'm still lost sometimes and trying to find a way that everyone will be happy. But eventually I found out that there's no way I could please everyone so with no guide in life at all, I just have to do what I think is right. I might bump and fall but I just have to pick myself up if that happens. Cause if I do things that way, there is noone to blame but myself. And there's more space for me to learn. So that people won't feel guilty for pushing me off a cliff. I hope my mum now knows that my life is my own and noone's else. Even tho I have been in her cage for so long but I still manage to have a glimpse of the real and somewhat colourful world outside of it. I have been a ghost of the world for so long. The world has been unaware of me for so long and if I don't do something soon, I will be forget by even God himself. So I have to be brave and take my first step, when I do, the world became clearer and closer to me. For all that I have learn in 2008, I bet that 2009 will be a better year as I'm always growing, always learning, always undiscovering new things, always fighting for what I think is right, always having fun and always will be me. Thank you, people. You're there for me and that's the reason why little-old-cowardly-me never feel lonely throughout all these. . . . . . . -I love the sentimental me.
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